Award Winning GENESIS SCHOOL OF MUSIC

➡️According to the Barna Research Group, around 25% of practicing Christians struggle with unforgiveness, while 53% of adults fear being hurt again, and 51% remain angry when even considering unforgiveness. Yet unforgiveness is associated with negative psychological impacts, such as depression and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), as well as many other health issues.  However, according to HopkinsMedicine.org, the act of forgiveness lowers the risk of heart attack; improves cholesterol levels; reduces pain, blood pressure, levels of anxiety, depression and stress. 

Unforgiveness is like taking the bitter moments of our lives and shoving them deep inside – and this has a major impact on our heart, physically and spiritually  – and Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything flows from it.” 

If you’re not sure if unforgiveness is an issue in your life, here’s FIVE SIGNS:

1…You’re waiting on their response to be OK – “I’m broken, and it’s their fault… I wouldn’t feel this way or be in this mess if it wasn’t for them…if they would change, then I would be OK.”

2…You don’t care what happens to them – “They’re dead to me…I haven’t thought about them for years, and I don’t want to…I’ve moved on.”

3…Your first thought of them is always, and immediately, the abusive situation – “every time I see them, I go back to what they did…I would just rather not think about them, because it always stirs up the past.”

4…You would get revenge if you could – “I want them to be corrected, fired, embarrassed, even harmed – they were wrong and they deserve it.”

5…You can’t pray for them. When Jesus was being crucified, he was still praying for his abusers – “Father, forgive them – for they do not know what they’re doing” – Luke 23:34.  I Timothy says to pray for ALL people; and in Luke 6:28, Jesus said, “Pray for your enemies”. 

If forgiveness is a command of Jesus, not a suggestion, what does it mean?  First, let’s look at what it doesn’t mean:

1…What they did was right – it was wrong, it was horrible, it really hurt. 

2…You’re ready to be friends again – we forgive, but that doesn’t mean we’re grabbing lunch after church; things may never be the same. 

3…They’re not responsible for the harm they caused – if someone does wrong, they need to be held responsible, but we’re not the judge, God is. God says in Romans 12:19, “Do not take revenge, I will repay.”  No one gets off for doing the wrong thing; eventually everyone pays. 

So what does it mean to FORGIVE?  Let’s take the five signs of unforgiveness and reverse them:

1…You can move on – if they never change, you’re OK

2…You care what happens to them – you want them to know God – you see them with the compassion of God.  God loves them as much as he loves you.  Not caring about them would be like my child not caring about their siblings, which would break my heart.  

3…Your first thought of them isn’t the abusive situation.  I Corinthians 2:16 says, “We have the mind of Christ” – our thoughts can be his thoughts.  It may not happen overnight, but it will happen.  Eventually, we can see others the way Jesus sees them. 

4…You don’t want revenge.  Ask the question – “Would I help them if I knew they were in trouble and I had the ability?”  You may not want to do lunch, but if they truly needed help, you would help them. 

5…You can pray for them – Pastor Bill Johnson said that his accusers are on his prayer list – he prays for their ministries, their families, their children, and their grand-children.  That’s so powerful!  Galatians 6:7 says, “I will reap what I sow”.  As I pray for others, others will pray for me; as I forgive, I’m forgiven ; as I give, I receive; as I speak well of others, people speak well of me; as I do good to others, people will do good to me. 

Jesus is our ultimate example of forgiveness, but King David has to be a close second –  as a teenager, his father left him out, his brothers pushed him off and even King Saul, the one he loved and served so well, falsely accused him and even tried to kill him.  But David never got bitter – even when God let his child die, David still wasn’t bitter.  Maybe the reason God called him a man after his heart was because his heart was so pure.  David chose to forgive again and again – and God honored him again and again.  His son must have seen this in his dad, because he’s the one that wrote in Proverbs, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything flows from it”. 

That’s in the Bible and the Bible is always right!